Here we go. I have a three-point lead on Tim, but that’s far from safe going into the most volatile week of the sea – eh, who cares, it’s pretty safe. Allow me to save time and declare myself champion once again!
Since I have won many a title before, I shall graciously use this opportunity to impart onto you my wisdom, as it pertains to coasting to certain victory:
- First thing’s first: Plan the parade. Those things are complicated. A lot of moving pieces, you have to block off roads, and so on. Do we even have enough barriers and such?? Best to get cracking on that early and inform the public so they, too, can have ample time to prepare.
- Second thing is
fourthsecond: Talk trash to your opponent so that they will be very scared and underperform. Victory, as you’ve determined, is certain. Taunt the guys in the other locker room so that, in addition to losing, they’ll feel very inferior as well. Since Tim is the guys in the other locker room in this instance, here is something I could say:
“That guy is so inferior, I don’t even know his name properly. I believe it’s Tin or possibly Tem.”
- Finally, just show up! It’ll be like the ’96 New England Oireachtas all over again. You’re only competing against like two other uncoordinated nerds, so just hike up the kilt a bit, connect on a few clicks and await the trophy ceremony.
Again, this advice is only helpful when you’re in the exact position that I’m in right now, which is very difficult to achieve. But here’s hoping you all get to experience it in years to come.
Happy New Year!
McManus Picks 